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May 5, 2013
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Time Really Can Change a Person (Personal Story)

Journal Entry: Sun May 5, 2013, 11:22 PM


About 4-5 years ago, in my Freshman year of High School, I lost my best friend of 15-16 years, Morgan.

Her mother and my mother were friends, so she and I grew up together and were like sisters.

But for some reason, as soon as High school started, Morgan started ignoring me.
I knew High school changes some people, but I never expected Morgan to be one of those people to change.

One day we were talking like any other day, the next few days she started ignoring me more and more until she was walking by me as if I wasn't even there.

I'm guessing it was due to our other friends.
She hung out with the other side of the lunchroom (so to speak) and my friends were.. well, the outcasts of school popularity. 

Morgan was always more popular then I was. She was always naturally thin, and very flirty and not scared to speak her mind to a guy. (She's bi-sexual now, but back then she and I checked out guys together.. she could've been bi back then, but she never told me she was until Freshman year) I was always heavyset, and too shy to speak to a guy since I feared rejection.
I guess you could say I loved Morgan because she was the opposite of me; the Yin to my Yang. (As cliche as that is lol)

But when she started ignoring me, it completely broke my heart. It happened so fast, my pain ended up turning into hatred.
I'll admit it, I hated Morgan. For the last 3 years of High School. I didn't even acknowledge her, as she didn't acknowledge me.

Over time, I stopped missing her. She may have changed, but I wouldn't, and I didn't.
I still hang out with the same friends I did back then.
Well, not counting Baylee.

Morgan, Baylee and I were a trio of friends for the longest time. We all lived by each other; I lived across the street from Baylee, and Baylee lived next door to Morgan. So we were never apart from each other.
With Baylee, I was the one who ended our friendship.
She started making fun of my friends behind their backs. She started dressing like a slut and slowly kept becoming more of a bitch overtime.
I saw the changes in her, and didn't like it.
We never had anything in common to begin with.
So I told her straight to her face about her talking about my friends. 

Last I heard of her she was living with her ex-boyfriend. She doesn't even visit her mother or little sister. But I honestly, don't care for her anymore.
(Unless she grew up and finally decided to stop being a bitch)

But anyways, back to Morgan...
After graduation, I was barely home.
My boyfriend Travis took a group of us up to his camp and I was able to get away from my life for a week.
And when I came back, thats when I saw her again.

Morgan is still living with her Grandmother, and she was walking her Pomeranian Holly.
After 4 years, we finally made eye contact.
And she smiled at me. Not a enthusiastic smile, but a smile as if you give a stranger out of being polite.
It was a civil smile.
So I smiled back, and went inside.

It's almost been a year since then and just a few days ago, my mother and I were unloading a cat tree from the truck. Morgan was walking her dog again and was coming in our direction, but instead of walking by, she actually made the effort to come over and introduce her dog to my mother.
The three of us actually had a normal conversation, and I didn't feel an ounce of hurt or anger.

And just this morning, she added me on Facebook.
And I accepted.

So we are not friends anymore, but we are both now old enough to realize there was no need to hate each other; and I think she realizes the mistakes she made as well. We are adults now, and it is time for us to be adults. So its nice to know I have her back, at least in the background. Someone that important to my life back then still means the world to me; and time really can change a person. For the worse, and for the better. 

I guess I'll just have to take it one step at a time. :heart:




Skin by Anysayuri (modified by iPandacakes)
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:iconcinammondrop:
CinammonDrop Featured By Owner May 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I cried. A little.
It is weird that time, can change a person. It is like they let us remember our past, have a severe pain in the present, and to change that bad moments in the future, or something like that, I guess.
But I am happy that you and your friend Morgan are coming back as friends again. I guess it takes step by step again.
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:iconipandacakes:
iPandacakes Featured By Owner May 7, 2013
Thanks :3 And no, not friends. I dont think we ever will be again, but we dont hate each other. And that's whats important
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:iconcinammondrop:
CinammonDrop Featured By Owner May 8, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Okay. I understand :)
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:iconskyfeather1387:
Skyfeather1387 Featured By Owner May 6, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I hope that's what happens with me. I have a very similar story to yours though the change happened beginning of middle school and the acting as if we don't exist is going on now xD I'm glad you posted this ^.^
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:iconipandacakes:
iPandacakes Featured By Owner May 6, 2013
Well we aren't friends still, but yes. As you get older, time makes you realize there's no need to act that way anymore. And when you have to start worrying about bills and how you're going to get support like medical insurance, little things like school age feuds seems to melt away.

Its amazing how much time can change a person
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:iconperegrinstaraptor:
PeregrinStaraptor Featured By Owner May 6, 2013
I know how you feel. I myself have been down that road too many times. Yeah, time does change people, but I'm happy that you and Morgan have become civil in this. I'll hope that it'll blossom into something good for you both in the future, might not be the friendship you 2 had once upon a time, but a kind of...civilship I guess...that'll be beneficial to you both.
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:icon14errantartistgd:
14ErrantArtistGD Featured By Owner May 6, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yeesh. I'm currently having a problem with me growing a little distant from a close friend due to us going to different high schools. And someone who I think of as a friend rarely talks to me, and I usually start the conversations, which are brief. So I'm trying to figure out who my friends really are.
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:iconpinkpopcornwithsoda:
PinkPopcornWithSoda Featured By Owner May 6, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Im so happy for you ^w^ , thats a real good lesson :3
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:iconxxdawnsoulxx:
xXDawnsoulXx Featured By Owner May 6, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
aaaaa i'm so happy for you! <3
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:iconemportant:
emportant Featured By Owner May 6, 2013  Student General Artist
Glad to hear about you and Morgan <3
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